"you can be naughty but you can't be rude or a liar"

alexis spends lots of time in school. together with her friends, they got into all kinds of mischief together. it is no secret that alexis loves to talk and unfortunately, getting on her teachers' nerves. her name is always being called out and written on the board because she did not display 'good' behaviour for that moment. as quoted from her teacher,"alexis likes to do the opposite." i doubt a day goes by where she is not thinking of some way to be mischievous.

there is something wrong with me.

whenever alexis told me her name was on the board for that day because she misbehaved, i said to her, "that's great!" i smiled. my colleague who is a mother of a boy and a girl, was shocked at my calmness portrayed.

every child is different and moves in and out of stages at a different pace. to me (and the man),as we get older we tend to create this box that everything is supposed to fit neatly into, all of our ideas and goals in life are according to some sort of plan. however as a child there is no box. it is just endless freedom to explore any and every possible avenue of creativity and adventure. i want my children to grow up willing and able to take risks, to develop an internal sense of right and wrong, rather than being dependent on external authority to tell them what they can and cannot do. i want them to develop self confidence and not to fear what someone else will think of them. i want my children to learn that mistakes are acceptable and that taking risks builds courage. and now i said it, sometimes disobeying the rules helps to build conscience.

not that i condone her misbehaviour all the time, some days this girl throws huge tantrums, some days she blatantly disobey our instructions, some days she she will do everything mentioned and then more. many times, i am filled with fury, embarrassment. i ground, withdraw her privileges and guilty to say, i judge her character. she probably do not mean to be disrespectful, disobedient, or defiant. but that often results when we adults interpret her behaviour that way.

with constant reminder to each of us, we must choose our battles, let the small stuff go, turn our head now and then, and let our children be a little bit naughty. every moment, the man and i are mostly trying our best.