cheese-less mac and cheese

yesterday, i was almost bedridden because god knows why, i was down with stomach flu which followed by bad churning and my face has been greeting the toilet bowl too much for my liking.

anyway, everybody is experiencing a horrid humidity in Singapore now. whilst everything and everyone here are so city and rush, it is really taking a toll on me. on weekends which i do not do anything, i will just cook, bake, clean, tidy and immerse myself in family love. i am not pretending, this is my colourful social life :)

alexis, typically a veggie and fruits kind of girl, has totally embraced her first "mac and cheese". thanks for creating a place in your heart for welcoming my cookings and bakings :) this cheese-less mac and cheese recipe with nutritional yeast, spinach and sautéed sliced mushrooms and chicken breast meat is seriously good (approved by the man!) and seriously good for our health too. it is packed with protein and vitamins while remaining very low in fat.

healthy mac and cheese
2 cups of pasta
300g silken tofu
1/2 cup nutritional yeast flake
2 cloves garlic
1 teaspoon kosher salt (omitted for alexis's portion)
1 teaspoon black pepper (omitted for alexis's portion)
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 cup mushroom pan sautéed with olive oil
1 cup sliced chicken breast meat sautéed with olive oil (omitted for alexis' portion; added sliced fresh fish instead)
2 cups tightly packed chopped spinach/kale

preheat oven to 180 degrees. boil and drain pasta. blend tofu, nutritional yeast flakes, oil, garlic, salt, pepper. stir blended "cheesy" sauce into cooked pasta with chicken, spinach and mushroom. heat the entire dish in the oven for 15 minutes. viola! healthy version of mac and cheese :)

danceeeee

if you look closer, you will see an angel in alexis. in the words of her, in the song she sings and in the eyes of her, she is trying to find her way. she is trying to find her place. she is trying to find herself. if you look close enough, you will find hope. she is an angel to help us to face the music in the world, to remind us that it will not always be darkness. at least this girl is my courage to make me hold on and face it all for another day. times with her are like a form of escape, it feels like i am disconnected from the harsh dreary reality world. she has brought me through the darkest patches in my life, she gives me a chance to discover things about myself I never would have. undeniably, sometimes there are unhappiness and an overdosages of quarreling with the man but we get through it, somehow, we get through it together and get all these issues resolved, with love. i admit i am never the best wife because i am very short-tempered but many lessons were learnt from experiences. now we can never imagine who we would be if we never had alexis.

this evening, the man and i had a pretty good time dancing with the girl. today she came back saying, "papa stand up! mommy stand up! DANCEEEEEEE!" yes, she learnt all these in school :) so much for that moment, i do not think a happy family dance in our cozy little private house is that embarrassing, right? everyone wants to feel young again once in awhile, don't we? :) our girl is a joke :)

monday not blue

today i was expecting lots of ranting and raving and whining and drama cryings as i was leaving but without blinking an eye, alexis took it all in her stride and walked into her classroom. i felt very much comforted and proud. she is constantly changing, be it the good or the bad and this is how my little girl has grown up, going onto the next stage of her live :)

diaper off

i feel good to hear alexis expressing herself when she needs to go to the toilet. up next weekend, diaper off during nappy time :)

we will be strong

i am glad that the girl is really enjoying school so far and adapting well although she skipped school for a week. the teachers told me that alexis is very independent and actively joins in when it comes to singing, dancing and gym lesson :)

every evening i fetch her, she would start smiling and running towards me, leaving me happy and clowning along because i know what she wants. at the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all she really want is to be close to the people she love. i would always carry her and tell her that i love her and she is a very brilliant and brave girl even though she has a few seconds of meltdown every morning. i wonder if she understands me when i tell her such things but you know what, i know she will understand them one day. during the times when she is sick, it made my heart ache, so bad and i wish i could do something to ease her cough or to stop the mucus.

despite all those negativities life can bring, we are strong individuals who would get by, get through all the difficulties we face somehow. so what is really important in life is not the big things other people have thought up but the small things i, myself have. i would trade anything in the world just to have us happy and healthy.

food experiment

over the past weekends, the man and i had been experimenting in the kitchen with food that we figure it will be pretty palatable for a growing toddler, such as smoothies, quiche lorraine, taco casserole, cashew oat balls, almond milk. they were really tasty and we had way more vegetables and superfood than meat, which is a good thing. i vouched we will make her for one day when we decide to allow her to be take part in our varied meal. currently at home, alexis is still eating her steamed food without sauce, salt, sugar and oil. it is totally odd how her homecooked meals are always the same everyday and i assume she had her first taste of sodium and sugar in school but alexis has never gets sick of such pure and healthy food which delight me much.

her everyday menu is somewhat like this:

breakfast – 5oz of milk, plain unsweetened greek yogurt, a cube of avocado. smoothie of assorted vegetables and fruits with chia seed during the weekends (supplement with fish oil, vitamin c, colostrum powder and probiotics)

lunch – pretty much anything that mindchamps serves. brown rice, quinoa, 3 different cubes of vegetables during lunches at home.

snack - pretty much anything that mindchamps serves. fruits, raisins, dried prunes, cheese or sometimes more yogurt during teabreaks at home.

dinner – brown rice, quinoa, 3 different cube of vegetable, a slice of fish (supplement with tahini, wheatgerm, brewer's yeast and flaxseed meal)

alexis loves this snack which i made yesterday, somehow i like it too :)

cashew oat energy balls
6 pitted dates
1/4 cup oats
1/4 roasted cashew nuts
1 tablespoon chia seeds
2 tablespoons flaxseed meal
1 tablespoons agave nectar (binding function)
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1 tablespoon coconut

combine dates, oats and cashew nuts in a blender and blend until finely ground. add all remaining ingredients except coconut and mix until combined. transfer to a small bowl and fold in coconut with a spoon. roll dough into balls and viola! cashew oat energy balls :) keep leftover in the refrigerator.

back to writing

a determined heart, we survived the virus attack and am now nursing my (our) health.

it was quite a hiatus. since i last wrote, alexis was down with cough and cold (and an afternoon of fever) on the start of the third week of school and she stayed away from school for the whole week. i was already hoping for better, bracing for worse when people warned me about the high possibility of a child getting sick upon entering childcare, but i did not expect it to be so fast.

the man and i were under the same virus attack soon after alex was sick and our bodies were malfunctioning. i get persistent coughs despite stuffing my face with a lot of medicine and since last week, i had been to the doctor thrice. this period has been slightly weird, like i am forever exhausted and feeling a bit too unmotivated for many things. nothing excites me, nothing to look forward to and absolutely nothing to be happy about, just constantly knackered. i do not know if i have overworked my body or it is a sign that i should take a step back and enjoy my life. either way, it has been really busy ever since the girl fell sick and i do not even have time to yelp about how time actually whizzes past so insanely and we are only four months away from the girl's big two.

alex is happily back in school this week. other than that, nothing is happening in my life. i am still blissfully married, happily being a mother but will hope less of a emotional rollercoaster :)